Senza Vincoli

ASK DEACONETTE:

From a man with too much time on his hands…

Quaeritur: I was wondering if you know the rubrics or know where the rubrics for lay instituted acolytes in the EF can be found?
At my parish, we try and do a lot of things in the extraordinary form, and I am trying to find some authoritative/knowledgeable source on what an instituted acolyte can/ cannot do/wear (in terms of the biretta) for liturgical celebrations (mainly outside of Mass). Thank you!

Respondio: Footwear is de riguer, of course. Socks and ideally, shoes, should you be able to afford them; sandals are generally frowned upon unless accompanied by the habit of your mendicant order. Opinions vary on athletic shoes and boots; Deaconette believes they are best avoided at liturgical celebrations if one has the wherewithal to make a substitution more formal in nature. Omit the wristwatch. Finally, some sort of undergarment is generally expected, though it ought to go unseen. Tighty-whiteys, boxers, briefs, boxer-briefs are all acceptable; the thong, g-string, athletic supporter, or cloth diaper with safety pin is only acceptable when the acolyte is serving in a non-public situation, e.g. in the chapel of the Cardinal’s beach home at the Jersey Shore.

What? Don’t act shocked, fornication with the Ordinary is perfectly ordinary. The Holy See knew all about Uncle Ted the Molester, and yet “Saint” John Paul II thereafter promoted him from Bishop of Metuchen to Archbishop of Newark, then to Archbishop of Washington, then to Cardinal-Priest of the Holy Roman Church. Benedict XVI didn’t act, either, which is yet another shining example of why Papa Rottweiler is not the “Pope of Christian Unity,” no matter what some capitevacantalist clericus vagans will have you believe.

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6 thoughts on “Senza Vincoli

    • Indeed your Deaconette hasn’t taken her final ride in the back of a Cadillac just yet. She just gets busy, and she also has a limited appetite for reviewing the 4P’s stupidity. Lately, there’s enough out of the White House to over-outrage her, and Father Zuhlsdorf has, in many ways, become redundant to her media diet.

      Liked by 1 person

      • “she also has a limited appetite for reviewing the 4P’s stupidity”

        that you have any appetite at all is a penance.

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  1. Wow, thanks for the report on another pervert who wears a lace dress to work telling men how to be men. If man loves a man or a woman loves a woman they belong to us, the human family. If a man touches a boy Christ himself said tie a millstone around his neck and toss him into the sea. It’s not too late for this for McCrapstick.

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  2. Zuhlsfroth, why are you so interested in BDSM? Did you read about the abusive priests in PA who did these acts on young boys? In all Christian scripture Christ showed anger four times… He cursed the fig tree, turned the tables over on the corrupt sellers in the temple, condemned those hard of heart and said it better that a molester have a millstone tied around his neck and he be thrown into the sea.

    God bless women’s endeavors to be empowered in Christ’s church.

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  3. It seems that Bp. Morlino has passed. I sincerely hope that he is at peace.

    I am curious as to what this means for the 4P’s status in the diocese of Madison. He hasn’t been incardinardinated yet per the Kenedy directory.

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